little sinkings in the earth

Oh damn I miss my daddy. Just out of nowhere thought about how he used to reach around behind him to toss out a bit of trash in the car trash bin, and after he did, he would find my foot or leg and tickle me or give me a little squeeze or a pat. Oh daddy oh wow do I miss you. :(

(via dancing-along)

signatureceremonies:

Since their father had passed away, the bride’s brother prepared a special moment for his sister’s father-daughter dance.

This will be happening at my wedding, with my dad’s brothers and best friend, probably to ‘Father & Daughter’ by Paul Simon.

ohdaddyimissyou.

Matt’s book was translated into German - including the translation #german #family #daddy

cream-and-stars:

poupon:

section9:

middlemanagementlivingthedream:

Losing My Religion (shifted to a Major Key)

A friend emailed me a link to this video (by way of BoingBoing)

Someone put “Losing My Religion” by REM through some processing, and turned the song from a minor to a major key.  While you can hear the occasional pitch-shiftiness on the vocals, and one or two chord changes don’t seem to settle in quite perfectly, the impact is nonetheless absolutely fascinating.  What had been a linchpin of 90’s alternative melancholia and loner rock becomes this almost defiant pop perk of a track.

Weird, I’m not sure of how to process this.

I want a breathy, twee indie band to cover this and make the Zooey Deschanel movie makeover complete. 

!!!

A lot. Of. Feelings.

This song, Losing my Religion by R.E.M., was my dad’s favorite song in his last few years of his life. He listened to it over and over again. He and I both happened to discover it and love it at the same time without realizing it, which was cool. When I came home for Christmas break my freshman year of college, we played through the entire CD together. Shortly after my father died, I was going for one of my many Moody Walks and listening to a playlist of songs he liked and I got to this line, 

“That’s me in the corner. That’s me in the spotlight, losing my religion. Trying to keep up with you, and I don’t know if I can do it.” I totally broke down. My daddy. My daddy knew he was dying. He knew people were looking at him, and he was simultaneously in the corner (“out of commission”) and in the spotlight. He was struggling to keep up and be ‘normal’ even though he was sick. And the ending — that was just a dream, that was just a dream. Even when he was in the hospital, on his death bed, he talked to my mom about how excited he was to get better so he could go for bike rides again.

Oh Daddy. :( :( :( I miss you so much and I’m so sorry you were sick and I’m so sorry you hurt and I wish I had spent every waking minute with you. I love you so much Daddy. I’m so sorry.

missing you daddy http://gifshop.tv/m/GVTYZ7I1Z7/

today: wake up after a few odd nightmares. shower etc. go to work. throw self into current job which is fortunately relatively interesting to avoid thinking too much. pray. lunch out. work some more. subway home. groceries. home with whole family. maybe socialize with each other (!)? light candle. Indian food & Beck’s for dinner — Daddy’s favorite. cry. read poetry. bed whenever you want, girl.

3 years since he died. Three. Years.

(Source: aroyangoren)

Gartan Mother’s Lullaby by Melissa Ericco

I sang this song (among many, many others) to my father on his deathbed. I sang this one many times when we were all alone, just me in the room with him, the beep-beeping machines, and me singing this song huskily over and over while stroking his hand or his forehead.

Oh, Daddy, I miss you. Today marks three years since you were taken from us. 

"

Woke up this morning with
a terrific urge to lie in bed all day
and read. Fought against it for a minute.

Then looked out the window at the rain.
And gave over. Put myself entirely
in the keep of this rainy morning.

Would I live my life over again?
Make the same unforgiveable mistakes?
Yes, given half a chance. Yes.

Raymond Carver, “Rain”

I wish. I wish.

(via middlenameconfused)

(Source: larmoyante, via jennifer-ruth)

Project 333

Is so exciting and I am having a great time going through my clothes actually. I plan to sell clothing to Like Twice, and I am giving myself a bit of wiggle room in the accessories department since I’m just getting started, but it’s still amazing. I am going to use my shelf space to hold my bazillions of extra books. 

And, I am remembering that Project 333 is “not about suffering”! AKA, I will allow myself to keep my homemade Hunger Games t-shirt in my closet — I never wear it, but it reminds me of Friend L — and the dress I wore to my father’s memorial service, even though I haven’t worn it a single time since the service. (Or before.)

I will post pics at the end to show off my simplified closet!!!