GOD I am so awkward and have sent too many emails to someone I might work with and also want to be hired by and I’m going to fuck everything up because I’m unprofessional and I just want to cry & hide.
24 years old. Queer. Indiana/New York. BA in Gender Studies. Counseling student. Germanophile, writer, reader (see my books here), feminist, runner, writer, lover, Nerdfighter. More about me :) In recovery from an eating disorder & PTSD, living with depression. Trigger warnings always apply, please take gentle care. What's up, babycakes?
tomorrow = exam and presentation and other presentation
cannot find crucial and seemingly easy to find yet impossible to find piece of data for presentation #1
have not actually typed up thingy for presentation #2, or even double-checked video
have had headache for like 8 solid hours
so, so, so tired
had first full on sobbing on the floor and then in David’s arms for like twenty goddamn minutes and now can barely breath
sobbing unable to breathe saying “I can’t I can’t I can’t I wanna go home I’m ss s so tired”
also work presentation for which I am totally unprepared on Thursday i.e. I am representing my job, alone, not like a presentation AT work
and huge presentation next tuesday for which I have done 0 research
today: up after not enough sleep meh. :( shower. pancakes and big-ass cup of tea. dress & gather books etc. drive to car repair place and drop off our baby. walk to campus. edit ethics paper. ethics readings. study assessment. lunch. ethics class 1 - 3:30. STUDY ASSESSMENT. home to STUDY MORE ASSESSMENT. dinner and then STUDYING ASSESSMENT. bed early.
“He met some chick and rushed into marriage (so they could fuck, obviously). Then he posted this picture to prove that, while he isn’t ‘pure’, she is…. Yes. Yes. This is what you think it is.”
(Thanks Bitch From Philly)
Congratulations!!! You’ve expended your one and only valuable aspect: your hymen! Now Jesus can only use you as a breeding machine.
This is like gross on gross on so many levels. I’m not even talking about bodily fluids here. How gross to have such an intimate moment destroyed by some asshole dude? How gross to have your worth be determined by the state of a thin piece of tissue inside your body? How gross to be deemed unworthy or of no value if you, as a woman, if you do not have this thin piece of tissue in tact when some dudebro decides he’ll marry you just so he can fuck you? It ain’t about love or commitment. It’s about domination. It’s about some jackass rushing you into marriage so he could be the one to break that tissue. Why is this important? Why does this matter?
I am so disgusted and all I have to say to that woman is “GIRL RUN! GO! GET OUT!”
This is so beyond the bounds of what’s even remotely decent or acceptable human behavior. I’d like to emphasize everything already stated above and mention that a hymen, that thin useless piece of skin, can break extremely easily, long before one’s “virginity is lost.” So, if a hymen were to be broken prior to becoming sexually active, would one attribute as much of this perverted Christian celebration and idea of purity as seen above to one’s first sexual experience? Or is an in tact piece of skin all that matters?
This is inherently demeaning to all women and placing value on a woman based upon not only her previous sexual experiences but a thin piece of skin is beyond the bounds of reasonable or acceptable human conduct. To go so far as to make such a personal event public is depraved and it is quite evident that the individual who posted this image does not fully respect their partner. This gross power play that many men engage in needs to stop.
I’m so disgusted by this I can barely focus enough to form even one coherent thought.
Yeeeeah. I flipped my shit when a guy I knew did something like this in high school. He decided to take a picture and show it to all his buddies. I was outraged, wrote a blog post about it (on my babby feminist blog, I thought I was the coolest and edgiest evar), and most of my guy friends at the time were sort of puzzled as to why I was so incredibly offended.
It’s like “Hey look, I did physical damage to my partner when I stuck my dick in them! Isn’t that awesome?”. Or “Hey, she might be embarassed by this but who cares letting everyone know I had sex is way more important than her feelings”. Or “My woman is super pure unlike your dirty and slovenly women”.
It is all intensely degrading and humiliating. Like, seriously, guys who are all scared of feminists because they supposedly hate men, when dudes do shit like this and then other dudes don’t really call them out on it, I really see no reason why I shouldn’t hate you.
The last sentence. The bolding is mine. And I stand by that. Always.
srsly tho if you have cats we won’t work out
ever ever ever ever
you need to get rid of those cats
cats are a dealbreaker
like literally if ryan gosling and rachel maddow came and asked me to have a threesome marriage with them but a condition was that there would be cats i would not do it that is how much i hate cats
I would spend all day everyday suffering so no I’m not interested in living life in an allergy med induced haze
sigh. so exhausted. left to do tonight: quick tidy room. quick tidy downstairs. bed by one am please. up early to say hi to Mom, clean house, go downtown to post office & lunch with Jeff and then home to clean, bathe dog, shower again, and get ready for concert