You know, I was going to not run today, as I have for the past 3 days, but I honestly feel weird not going. I feel sort of…itchy to get out there. It would be exciting to be a runner again as I used to be.
Anyway…I’m lacin’ up and headin’ out. Might as well do weights again too while I’m at it!
It came up today on the Nerdfighter group I belong to on Facebook so I thought I’d copy/paste my reply/story here for posterity and if any of my followers want to know more about my experiences. I don’t think this is especially triggering (no mention of symptoms or weight) but I do talk about therapy, my diagnoses, etc. so please take gentle care.
Everytime I even think about wedding planning I freak out. Dress shopping is out because a) Shopping is terrifying (body image, introvertedness plus salespeople chatting at me and b) I don’t have close enough friends here to go with so I’ll look like a loser. I got a survey from the photographer asking questions that I can’t fucking answer. Where will the groom get ready? I don’t fucking know. What time is the ceremony? Beats me! When will the reception end? Um…when everyone goes home?
Here’s a fun april fools day prank you can do. Sneak into my room and place thousands of dollars everywhere. Just on everything. Cover my things with an insane amount of money. Make it a real hassle to clean up. The more money the better the prank.
Starting this summer, David and I will be living in a bigger and nicer apartment that allows pets. We are considering getting a small non/low-shedding dog. There are a few rescue dogs in Indiana that fit the bill for us (like Percy the four pound dachshund-yorkie mix omfg). We’ve both owned dogs (with our families). We travel maybe 2 or 3 times a year and would hope to travel with the dog at times, but also it isn’t too hard to find pet-sitters here. I would travel for work next year 3 days a week (about an hour commute) but David will be home a LOT because he will just be teaching one or two classes and dissertating. Any thoughts? What should we read or talk about before preparing to make the jump?
Missing church because my urinary tract is causing me too much pain to leave home, and because David and I have been fighting for like 20 hours.
I hope I get hit by a car. I hate my life. I’m miserable. The best part was probably 3:45 am when David started blasting classical music for no apparent reason and I woke up after having cried myself to sleep while unable to stop thinking about my father’s corpse.