I frequently (at least once a day) fantasize about just about one month from today, when David and I will fly to South Dakota for our friend’s wedding. I will bring fun books to read. I will get to do things over that weekend including: going to a bar, eating in a restaurant, shopping, having a manicure, seeing cool sights/learning FOR FUN, BEING AT A WEDDING, singing, dancing, general frivolity
oh vacation why must you be 3 papers, 1 test, 1 presentation, and a bunch of other nonsense away
I’ve really enjoyed the pagan parts of today’s holiday (sunrise ritual with David, egg/bunny themed little gifts) as well as the Christian parts (a tiny bit of Bible study we dropped in on, singing in church choir, hearing the sermon) and the social aspects (Easter luncheon with big group of friends, talked a lot with Sadie as well as Heidi and Emily and Matt [I always love talking to Matt and Sadie argh I wish I saw them more often and wasn’t so awkward argh], and talking to my lovely Grandma for half an hour) but I am also enjoying lying mostly naked on my bed watching Netflix and eating off-brand sour cream and onion potato chips.
overeating junk food that I don’t want to eat wasting time with crying stubbing my toes when I kick things because I’m upset developing mild UTI type things crying, did I say that one? falling behind on work
You know, I was going to not run today, as I have for the past 3 days, but I honestly feel weird not going. I feel sort of…itchy to get out there. It would be exciting to be a runner again as I used to be.
Anyway…I’m lacin’ up and headin’ out. Might as well do weights again too while I’m at it!
It came up today on the Nerdfighter group I belong to on Facebook so I thought I’d copy/paste my reply/story here for posterity and if any of my followers want to know more about my experiences. I don’t think this is especially triggering (no mention of symptoms or weight) but I do talk about therapy, my diagnoses, etc. so please take gentle care.
Everytime I even think about wedding planning I freak out. Dress shopping is out because a) Shopping is terrifying (body image, introvertedness plus salespeople chatting at me and b) I don’t have close enough friends here to go with so I’ll look like a loser. I got a survey from the photographer asking questions that I can’t fucking answer. Where will the groom get ready? I don’t fucking know. What time is the ceremony? Beats me! When will the reception end? Um…when everyone goes home?
Here’s a fun april fools day prank you can do. Sneak into my room and place thousands of dollars everywhere. Just on everything. Cover my things with an insane amount of money. Make it a real hassle to clean up. The more money the better the prank.